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I lay in my room, alone, with only the dim flickering of 7 candles giving light.
The smoke rises slowly from the top of the incense stick, spreading a dry scent
of vanilla throughout the room. Porcelina of the Vast Oceans plays quietly in
the background. The words "Not a care in this whole world, not a care in this
life, it's what you take that makes it right" ring through my head and connect
with my heart and soul as if they were one with me. I remember the times of the
past, when I felt life was worth living, that people had compassion and cared
about me. I knew it was time to execute my plan, yet I still hesitated, knowing
that this was the end of my time in the realm of mortals. Then as fast as a
clap of thunder on a silent night my hand rose and threw the pills into my
mouth. They rolled back down the pipe roughly and left a bitter aftertaste.
The song moved into the second verse and I listened to it intently. I began
slipping into a dream world where the music became a reality. I could see her
standing on a rock by the waterline, but the fog was too heavy to see beyond
her. Waves crashed below her feet and her long blonde hair was flowing
rhythmically in the seashore winds. I was walking toward her and I realized I
walking over the water. I looked down and saw brightly coloured fish bolting
around beneath me. The thin clouds blew rapidly over the dark gray skies. I
turned back to Porcelina, and she mesmerized me even more than before. I could
not remove my eyes from her angelic beauty. As I neared her, the fog began to
clear and the skies brightened. Behind her was an endless world of tropical
beauty. Red, blue, and green birds flew above our heads singing a slow euphoric
melody. The jungle trees swayed from side to side perfectly in harmony with the
melody. I turned back, forgetting from where I came, but only saw the sea fade
into darkness at the horizon. My worries were over. Porcelina took my hand and
led me silently, gracefully into the jungle of eternity.
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