Loneliness
by Julie Murdock

I have a room
Furnished ramshackle and wooden
Energy almost into minus,
No window, no light-
At the mercy of day and night-
Dark and cold
I shiver

We all have a room:
A place to keep our people.
They love, they know, they care and understand
And lean on each other,
Sit on warm sofas
And turn out the lights safe in each other's arms

I have no lights. I have no light
No window; my room is my world
No people no love
I lean on only wood chip.
I breathe and
The smoke echos damp sound off damp wooden walls, and
With my breath I kiss the time away.
I fear the dark. It is always dark.
Dark and cold
I shiver

These people,
They sicken me;
Jealousy
But do they even exist at all?
Out of my window I see
Nothing;
I have no window
Just me
But I am nothing,
Everything is void everything is wood everything is
Silence.
But my loneliness hums
Like a swarm of bees...
What are bees?
My window tells me they don't exist and
All I know is loneliness.

Julie knows love
Julie is in her room light years away
Julie belongs
I am not Julie
Who the hell am I?
I am void
I am nothing
I am lonely.

If a tree crashes in the rainforest
It does not make a sound,
And if the loneliness of a girl in a room hums
It does not make a sound.
I am not lonely;
I am nothing.

© Copyright 2000 by Julie Murdock

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